Win or Lose, it's Competing that Counts!

This is a message that has been uttered many times before, but watching the exemplary conduct of the participants in the BBC Sports Personality of the Year competition reminded me of how important this is. It's easy in these credit-crunchy times to give up the ghost, bury one's head in the sand and submerge beneath whatever metaphors one cares to use, but new years should encourage us to gird our loins, regard every new day as a sacred opportunity, and get right back into the fray!

This sentiment was, in my opinion, most eloquently expressed by President Theodore Roosevelt and repeated by Tom Watson the captain of the 1993 United States Ryder Cup golf team in his victory speech:

It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled or how the doer of deeds might have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy cause and who, if he fails, at least fails while bearing greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who never know victory nor defeat.

All of us at Seltek would like to wish everyone the very best of luck and happiness in 2009! (Keep looking for the pony!) (http://www.seltekconsultants.co.uk/HotsheetArchive/200808.htm)

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Seltek's Annual Christmas Competition!

Yet again astounded by the sheer volume of the response to our Christmas Competition, we were almost compelled to hire in some cheap labour from a distant place to deal with it. However, we have sifted through the entries, and the judges have cogitated and deliberated, and after a great deal of hemming and hawing, have decided upon a winner:

The winner of the 2008 Seltek Consultants Christmas Competition is........(long delay in the best tradition of Big Brother, Strictly..etc)...Mr RC of Befordshire! Congratulations Mr RC, you will be the happy recipient of a bottle of sumptuous red wine (chosen over bubbly by the contestant) which will hopefully reach you before the festive day itself.
Mr RC's witty captions are written below. Two runners-up Mr AO of Aberystwyth and Mr GW of XY receive a box of chocolates for their valiant efforts.

Thank you to all those who took part (see Article No.1 above!) and better luck next time to everyone who came close but did not win.

Merry Christmas to one and all from everyone at Seltek Consultants!

Click an image to enlarge
Winston realised that a Hat and Mac was the correct dress for "Pall bearer" interview.He did question the "quick decision promised" though!	Prior to Sue's arrival the "casual dress code"had not caused a problem for the annual company picnic	Once again the 0571 418323 number of KABZ R US causes a problem for the Stortford Police Dept

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New Latest Jobs Notification Email

Since it's not possible to make this interesting to anyone other than fellow IT geeks - I'll make it short!

Most of you will by now have noticed that the latest jobs email is being sent out in a different format. What you may have missed is that this is a new improved and vastly superior system ... well, it's a lot better anyway. The main changes are:

• Previously you were only able to filter which jobs you were notified about using the skills category. The new system enables you to filter on skills, industry category, job category, preferred location and salary.
  
  
• Previously if there was more than one job for you this would have been sent to you in separate emails. The new system bundles all the jobs up into one email.
  
  
• If you were previously receiving no job notifications and are now receiving everything it's likely you have not entered any preferences on your profile page. Just log in to FastTrack from our home page, click the "Profile" tab and indicate your preferences in the highlighted sections.

If you really do want more information you can find that HERE. If you need any help, or would like me to set these filters up for you just email me - Steve Page at steve@seltekconsultants.co.uk.

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A Cautionary Tale...

A person from one zone of the world, another person from another zone...., O fiddlesticks to this political correctness! An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman died and went to the Pearly Gates at the same time. St Peter greets them and says "You know lads, Heaven is a very big place, so you're going to need some wheels to get around. The nature of the vehicle depends on what sort of a life you've lived." He turns to the Englishman and asks "John, for example, how many times were you unfaithful to your wife?" John replies "Well St Peter, I know I can't lie to you. There were a couple of times with that cute babysitter...I know it was bad but she was irresistible!" St Peter says "Yes John, you're right, it was bad, but not that bad. So you're going to get a Robin Reliant." St Peter then turns to the Scotsman and asks him the same question. Jock replies "Och aye St Peter, I know you're all-seeing and all-knowing, so I have to tell you that it must have been fifty or sixty times!" St Peter says "Well, Jock, that was certainly pretty bad. So for that reason, you're only going to get a moped."Then he asks the same question of Paddy the Irishman, who replies "Begorrah St Peter, my wife was a wonderful woman and I loved her dearly. I can honestly say that I wasn't unfaithful to her once, never even thought about it!" St Peter says "You're quite correct Paddy, and that is precisely why you will be driving around Heaven in a brand new, top of the range Mercedes, with all the bells and whistles!"

A few days later Jock rides up to a set of traffic lights on his moped, and stops next to Paddy (in his shiny new Mercedes). Paddy's head is on his arms on the steering wheel, and he is sobbing uncontrollably. "What's the matter Paddy? " asks Jock, "You should be happy, in your shiny new Mercedes and all."
And Paddy replies "It's all very well, but I've just seen my wife going by on a skateboard!"

Ed: I heard this joke from the admirable four times All-Ireland bodhrán champion Eamon Murray of the equally admirable Irish folk band Beoga http://www.beogamusic.com/ at The Cambridge Folk Festival this year.
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Hot Jobs

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• Great opportunity for PhD to go commercial!
• Highly innovative market leader with outstanding products, continually addressing market needs with ground breaking product solutions!
• Help develop marketing literature and presentations!
• Travel to Europe and the US!
• Great structured training and support, very team oriented!
• Expansion as a result of high customer demand!

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£30,000 basic

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£12,000 OTE, car, pension, healthcare

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• A globally recognised market leading brand!
• Developed territory with a number of existing accounts, yet still plenty of opportunity to develop the region further!
• High level of support from head office, technical, marketing and sales support!
• Suitable for those with no life science sales experience looking to move into the market!

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Sales Specialist - rapid reaction kinetics instrumentation 

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£32,000 basic salary, £38,000 OTE

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Car, plus £6,000 OTE (uncapped)

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• Opportunity to grow with expanding company!
• UK and international sales of rapid reaction kinetics instrumentation! 
• Applications demonstrations, installations and sales; you are in control of the sales cycle!
• A perfect opportunity to further your sales career in UV-vis spectroscopy based technology!
• A trainee would also be considered if you have strong technical or laboratory experience!

Clinical Jobs

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• Up and coming, international CRO
• Step up into line management! Full support and training provided!
• Project management of clinical data management activities
• Get involved in business development and client relationship management!

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• Fast growing, progressive company at the leading edge of evidence-based healthcare services!
• Service offerings that cover early stage product planning through to post approval development!
• Opportunity to get involved in a range of activities including feasibility, ethics, contract negotiation, vendor liaison and training site staff on the use of novel clinical technologies!
• Get involved in co-ordinating clinical activities on an international level with additional responsibilities at local project management level!
• Excellent opportunity to get involved at ground level with a company poised for explosive growth in Europe!
• High profile offices in the centre of London!

Hot Candidates

Ho Ho Ho! T'is the season of incomparable jollity! So employers, just in case the cre*it cr*nch is getting you down:

It was Christmas Eve at the meat counter and a woman was anxiously picking over the last few remaining turkeys in the hope of finding a large one.
In desperation she called over a shop assistant and said, 'Excuse me. Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
'No, madam, 'he replied, 'they're all dead.'

Ba-boom!

Question:   Why is Christmas just like another day at the office?
Answer:     You end up doing all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Ba-boom!

If you're not cackling with laughter already, check out some of our best Christmas crackers to help you build your businesses in 2009!

Scientific Sales & Marketing Division

European Sales Director
This individual would be the crowning glory to any corporate christmas tree, with experience of leading pan European sales teams of up to 50 people with full P&L responsibility for sales of $150M.  He is familiar with the life science, diagnostics and medical devices markets, a proverbial bird within a bird within a bird with all the trimmings, those being a solid understanding of marketing and operational management.  A key skill that could be of significant benefit to a future employer is his strong track record of change management; he has a truly remarkable ability to genuinely change sales teams approaches developing significant growth.  Interested employers should move quickly as I understand a certain Mr Claus has expressed serious interest, and as we all know a company sleigh is highly attractive in these environmentally conscious times! 
Reference 93591PSP
€180,000
Europe

Field Applications Specialist
Santa has a great big surprise for your company in his sack this Christmas! She has a PhD in Molecular Biology with considerable postdoctoral experience and even more considerable internal applications support/ sales experience with the life science industry. This outstanding candidate can also speak fluent French which is an additional bonus for any company! She would now like to step into the field as a Field Applications Specialist. She will be the shining star at the top of your tree this Christmas. Don't miss out on this sparkler! Grab her from Santa's sack before someone else does!
Reference 94597CRD
£35,000 basic
Cambridge

Sales Representative
And lo! What cherub do I see before me - one of Seltek's best candidates to date no less!!!. Miraculous field experience in protein chemistry and molecular biology will help this person turn your Scrooge-like clients into veritable big spenders. PhD qualified with excellent research experience in the laboratory, the ability to form great client relationships, and a verifiable track record of ultra-high achievement will make this one present you will want to unwrap as fast as possible!
Reference 43856SJW
£33,000
South East

Science graduate with direct sales experience - a new business hunter!
Christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat, time to put a penny in the old man's hat! Here is a biotechnology graduate who has already clocked up some mileage in commercial and direct sales experience who will surely put some pennies in your hat! A pure new business hunter who has hit target every month in a very competitive industry.  He is looking for a science based field sales role to help you beat the competition in these tougher market conditions.  If you need to hit the numbers to add a little tinsel to your toytown, you need to speak to my candidate...
Reference 84798JKP
£20,000 basic
North West / North East

Account Manager
Don't miss out on this festive cracker - people of this calibre only come around once a year (just like Santa Claus!). Excellent sales experience selling mince pies (molecular biology reagents) and more recently progressed into a range of luxury Christmas puds (pharmaceutical services) she will climb to the top of your Christmas tree and be a true angel! Contact me now otherwise she will be gone in a flash (as quick as Santa Claus and his trusty Reindeers!) Don't miss out on this star in the East!
Reference 92531JRP
£32,000
London

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Clinical Research Division

Contracts & Sourcing Manager
The best Christmas gifts are those you don't ask for because you think there is no chance that even Santa Claus could pull it out of the bag! This candidate is one such gift, a rare treat that will warm your cockles like a citrus packed glass of mulled wine! With an outstanding background that combines proposals, contracts and outsourcing this candidate would be high on any Business Managers Christmas wish list! This high performer has experience of both CRO and pharma environments enabling him to save money for a pharma client and maximise profit for a CRO! If you want to find the solution to your New Year business challenges, simply leave out your best whisky and mince pies on Christmas Eve, along with your contact details, and wait and see!
Reference 94564DE
£50,000 + car + benefits
M4 Corridor

Business Development Manager
Behold! Unto Earth there came an angel, and the angel was called (name available upon request), and the angel was good! A brilliant, glittering academic background - PhD Molecular Biology - and untold eons (well, not that long actually!) of consistently successful commercial experience with some of the highest profile healthcare organisations in existence, will equip this miracle of nature to bring great blessings to your company. Don't spend Christmas wishing upon a star, interview one!
Reference 80913DE
£52,000, £65,000 OTE
South East